If you asked me to put on a song this time last year, there would have been a 95% chance you’d end up hearing male voices. I was convinced I didn’t like female singing voices so most of my playlist consisted of male singers, boybands, bands with only male members, and instrumentals created and/or played by men. Sad, no?
So what changed? About this time last year I became aware of the lack of diversity in the music I listened to and posted a tweet asking people for recs. At the time my account was even smaller than it is today and my followers were not very interactive so I only got a single reply. Fortunately, even one is enough sometimes. One of my irl friends follows me on twitter and reads my tweets religiously (though she doesn’t interact with very many of them) and she happens to be an avid listener of music made by women, sung by women, showcasing girlpower.
I told her I was looking for female singers and groups with either female lead singers or a membership that was at least 50% female and she delivered. She made me a playlist of a 100 songs by some 80 different artists in all kinds of genres and styles. It was a good mix of old and new stuff and she threw in some wild cards. It took me several months to listen through all of those a few times to make up my mind about them. I was honestly prepared to dislike most of them but I loved (LOVED) at least 25 of them and liked a good majority of the rest. There were many I disliked too and I was very honest about it too. Then a few days later I got a new playlist sent to me. There were 150 songs this time. The ones I disliked were replaced and 50 new ones were added, some by new artists and others by artists now familiar to me.
I’m still going through this second playlist (sorry, friend) but she did conclude I like 1) songs with loads of percussion (makes sense, since I always loved the drumming in metal music) and 2) dreamy songs so this list contains more of that. However, I have made an interesting discovery. I am now, after a year of intense exposure to female voices and songs, actively seeking out music by women without even thinking about it.
Those who read this blog might have noticed that I like kpop. My new header even features Kim Jonghyun of SHINee with a quote that explains the past decade or so of my life. But much of my taste was very limited to boy groups and the occasional male solo singer or rapper. While I still love music by men and male voices, and while I still dislike certain female voices, including even some very mainstream artists who make millions, I find myself looking for female kpop artists too. Now my preference is for solo songs, whether from solo artists or members of groups that got solo songs, because I still don’t really like when many female voices harmonise in a song. I get very overwhelmed and it makes the experience unpleasant but I love duos and solos.
My current obsession is 2NE1’s CL. I’m crushing big time on her and her music is to blame, though she is absolutely gorgeous and her looks are definitely no turn off.
I’m very happy with this positive change I’ve made and I definitely have my friend to thank for it. I did take that first step myself; I reached out to people when I decided something had to change. If I hadn’t done this, I would not be where I am now. I think such a progression might have happened naturally, without interference, as I grew up and grew as a person but it would have taken so much longer, I’m convinced of that. There is no way I would’ve gone from disliking female voices to actively seeking out all these incredible artists in a single year.
And I recommend it to everyone. Is your playlist 75% male? How diverse is your music taste? Finding stuff from women but also from genres you normally avoid might be eye opening. You won’t love every genre but dismissing an entire genre based on one song (or 5 or 10) is dumb and you will be missing out. Reach out to friends and acquaintances, family members and strangers online (me!), and try to learn and explore. Maybe your taste won’t match mine at all and you’ll hate every suggestion I do. But maybe your girlfriend has really good taste but you never bothered to give it a fair shot. And if, after you’ve listened to some two hundred songs by about 100 different artists in at least 5 different genres, you still don’t like any of them, look into yourself and see why. Maybe there’s something wrong with your ears (it might be, I’m serious. I’m a little sensitive so high pitched sounds don’t sound good to me) or it could be a mental/psychological/hormonal issue. It’s worth looking into. Or you could just be really cynical or bigoted. Are you naturally stubborn? Do you hate trying new things? Do you see the world as a pile of shit where anything you don’t already like is crap?
I don’t want to make this post too long and I don’t want to add more negative things. I’ve had a really rough day, month, summer, and basically year but I think talking negatively all the time and complaining a lot makes you more vulnerable to seeing the world that way too and that’s no fun. For me, distractions work a lot better than talking about negative feelings and thoughts so when I noticed this changed perspective when it comes to music I thought it’d make a much better post than anything negative I could’ve put. Maybe your music taste is already super diverse (go you!) but your taste in books or movies could use some work. The same method would work.
Personally I noticed that many of my favourite books are by white male authors. Why? Because 90% of the books I read are by white male authors. So this year I decided I’m only allowed to spend money on books by POC. Then next year (sept 2020-aug 2021) I will only buy books from people of the LGBTQ+ community, or those that don’t want to be in the LGBTQ+ community but aren’t allocishets. And throughout I’m trying to buy more books written by women than by men. I’m also looking for enby authors but that’s a little harder when you don’t have access to Amazon. I try though.
Whatever you take from this post, I hope it will make you more adventurous about trying new things, moving slightly out of your comfort zone. There is unfortunately no creative piece at the bottom of this post but 2019 has not been a good year for writing for me, or any kind of productivity, really. Hopefully 2020 will be better and I will try to stock up on some short pieces or poetry so I can update more frequently.
Have a nice day! And if you want to recommend any music or books or movies, please do.
Arthur's rambling 